Christmas Eve

I hope all of you are having a wonderful holiday season. It seems to be flying by. Isn't that strange? As we get older, the time just zooms right past us without even a second glance. It's kind of a bitter sweet thought. We have less time, but we are given the chance to make the most of it.

Update time!
I just finished my first semester as a high school senior. It was grueling. But I've been told next semester will be easier. Hopefully. My boyfriend got accepted to Ohio University. Not to be confused with Ohio STATE University. Go Bobcats! I got him the greatest Christmas present ever, it's going to blow all my other gifts out of the water, that's for sure. I'm almost eighteen. That's terrifying. My parents are totally fine with it, and I'm the one freaking out. Journalism hasn't gotten any easier. I recently discovered the greatest friend ever. You know, one of those friends you just click with and it's like "hey where have you been this whole time?" Yeah...anyway, who's ready for another life lesson?

As we draw closer to the new year, people start those terrible and unattainable "New Year's Resolutions". What a complete waste of time. We, as humans, like to think that we can better ourselves in the blink of an eye because we are "evolved". HA! We set these impossible standards for ourselves and the people around us, we lose sight of what should really be important. Sure it would be nice to have a world filled with perfect humans, but that ain't happening anytime soon. Try something new this year. Instead of those typical resolutions: lose ten pounds, save up for a car, fly to the moon...maybe give something else a try. Go for walks after dinner, plant a flower, try a new flavor of soda. Just focus on the little things that can make you happy, not perfect. Now I know this lesson is a bit scatter brained, but focus on the message. We don't need to be perfect to be happy. And for all you single people out there, here's a tip; If you can be happy by yourself and with yourself, you will attract another happy person. And that's where it all starts.

Stay happy my friends, and have a happy holidays.

Ho-Ho-Ho-Holidays

Well, December is here folks. It's certainly been awhile, sorry about that. Senior year is proving to be more difficult than I thought. Bt it's okay, I can handle it . . . I think. The holidays are such a strange time of year. There is so much going on, it's hard to absorb everything. Now before I get to life lessons and all that, let me catch you up on a few things . . .

I moved. Like, I moved houses. I'm now ten times farther away from school, oh joy. I have a car, that I can't drive, YET. School is hard. Friends are confusing. Still have a boyfriend. I just realized I need to start my Christmas shopping. Oh yeah and I forgot to mention that I hate journalism. Who knew it would suck the life out of me, and it's only the first semester. I'm drowning in stress. I didn't think that was possible, but I have found out that it is very possible. I don't feel like it's preparing me for what I actually want to be, a journalist. Now don't get me wrong, I love my teacher and the staff. They are all so amazing. I just hate how I feel like I'm letting them down every day. The stress is affecting my work, in a very bad way. I use to be such a good writer, now I suck.
I think you're all caught up now.

Time for life lessons.
I know it's stupid, a 17 year old with life lessons. But I have seen enough in my short time here on this planet, to know what's what. Big life changes can be amazing and wonderful, or just down right bad. I can't even think of a better word. Bad. Adults say, "just take it one step at a time, it will be okay." LIES. Complete lies. I mean I know adults lie to us for our own good but sometimes they need to grow up and just tell us the truth. Sit the kid down and say, "This will totally suck and your'e gunna hate it. But I'm sorry that's life, let's go get a cookie." I improvised that last part. But it's true. Life is evil sometimes. Now personally, I don't believe in the guy upstairs, the Almighty, number one, or for those who couldn't guess, God. I like the idea of believing in something bigger than me, and I do. It's jut not really a religion. Getting off topic, my point is that life is going to suck sometimes and people need to understand that. Will it get better? Sure it will. But we don't know when or how to make it get better faster. You just gotta do what Edison did and keep failing until you understand what not to do. Failing and being miserable can be fun, believe it or not. It helps you understand what true happiness really is. Now before I bore you, let me leave you with this: In order to enjoy those wonderful moments in life, you must first have a terrible one. Otherwise, you just won't understand what makes those moments so wonderful.

Taking A Step Back

It certainly has been a long time. I'm not sure how many of you read this, but I'm a Senior now. Crazy right? Is started this blog my freshman year. Four glorious years talking about absolutely nothing. I am going to continue using this. I mean, why not? Some people read it, I might as well keep them entertained. I'll admit, being a senior has me scared. No doubt about that. But what happens after I cross that stage and move my little tassel o the other side, I'm even more afraid of that. When people say  high school goes by fast, they aren't lying. It was possibly the fastest four years of my life. But every moment and memory was worth it. From being a fumbling freshman to becoming a starry-eyed senior, I really have changed. I'm still not prepared for the real world yet. But who really is? It's different for everyone. Some go straight to college or to work. Others do both. And from there it only gets harder and the journey becomes more unique to its individual. Who knows where I'll end up. USC, writing for the school news paper, maybe even doing the school news program. Or maybe I'll get some little job, work my way up from there until I'm running the place. It's all a blank slate. There are parts of high school that will follow you into the real world, hopefully they are good. The scary part is just not knowing what will and could happen. It's like choosing the treasure behind closed doors. You know it's there, but where? Life doesn't come with an instruction manual or map. There is no set of rules that everyone must play by. It's not a game, and it's not about believing in yourself. Life is about choosing the best bad idea you have and saying "What the hell?" . . .

Let's Play Catch Up

Well it certainly has been awhile. I'd like to say not much has happened, but you know that would be a lie. My life always has new...twists as turns if you'd like to say. I've been comparing myself to a yo-yo lately. Being being pulled in one direction, and dropped, then being yanked right back. It hurts a little. Some people find direction with religion. But I have no direction. I'm like a compass that's been put near a magnet and my little needle just keeps spinning in circles. I'm not the best at science, so I'm unsure of how good that simile was.

I'm only seventeen. Tons of people find this hard to believe. I look, act, and think older. I wouldn't say I'm mature, I guess I just radiate some sort of ancient comforting vibe that everyone seems to feel is a wise power I posses. Everyone expects so much because of this. They feel like I can handle anything thrown at me. Yes, I am a hurdler for the track team, but not in reality. I can't just get over everything with ease and speed. In fact if you had reality be the hurdle to my races I would never finish. I can't get over things easily. I have to take time. I need to recover and try to understand. In order to handle me you must be patient. I look strong on the outside, but really I need to labeled "handle with care", I can be easily broken. And sometimes unrepairable.

Time

Time. 

So many meanings. 

More time. 

Less time. 

Overtime. 

On time. 

Time. 

Basically everyone has the same amount of time to accomplish something. Growing up, learning, getting a job. Overall it's the same amount. 

True: we only have one life.

False: we have to live every moment to the fullest.

When you're on your death bed, you're not going to have time to think back to EVERY, SINGLE day of your life. You want to be able to look back on a handful of cherished and prized memories. Memories where you can recall every little detail. Sight, smell, touch, sound, taste. All of it. The time we have isn't to live to the extreme everyday. In the end it's the little things you come to appreciate. Like seeing the same face when you wake up in the morning. Or getting that greeting from your neighbor everyday. Sometimes in the end, the little stuff is what makes you realize it's all worth it.

Sure some people will disagree and say that the little things don't count. But I remember the little things now and I'm seventeen. Don't live every day to the fullest just because you think in the end it's what you''ll remember most. Just let the moments happen and in the end you'll realize which ones turned into memories.

Only

I hate that word. I know it's stupid. How could someone hate a word? But just the sound of it is stupid. ONLY. Only. Only. Only. It has no meaning to anything. I'm only seventeen. I'm only a girl. It's only Saturday. It almost sounds like an insult. People say I'm "only a child" and that I don't know what I'm talking about. They are ONLY adults. Half the time adults act like our mistakes are this new thing and they don;t understand why we did it. Well they were once ONLY children. People hang this word over us. Thinking it will change our mind. And usually that works. If a fifteen year old wants to get a job, they can't because they are only a child. let me tell you, some fifteen year olds are more mature than some twenty-five years olds. This word has many meanings. Being single; the only option; being recent. An only child. You can only go to your room. I only read that yesterday. These are how you use the word.

S.O.C.K.S.

This is a little something I learned from my Spanish teacher; if you spell out the words socks really fast, it sounds like eso si que es (pardon my terrible Spanish). Which very losely translates to "that's just the way it is". I always thought this was kind of cool. I've noticed in life, there are lots of "socks" moments. Something happens and all you can say is "that's just the way it is", not much else can be done. We can't control everything in our life, unfortunately. But would we really be happy if we were in total control of every single thing in our life? Maybe yes, and maybe no. Controlling every aspect of our lives would make our world mundane...no surprises, no accidents. Serendipity as we know it would no longer exist. And for some people, that is all that they live for. I believe that things happen for a reason. And yes, sometimes that reason is unclear, or we don't like it...but all I have to say to that is.... S.O.C.K.S.